Back to the Quad

Alright it seems like I start off every blog post on the same note, but again, I'm sorry I haven't written and I have a lot of news to report. Some good, some bad. And some hilariously bad.

Let's start with the bad. I didn't get the Justigiving job, which was a big kick in the pants (not to mention a big F-U to my self-confidence). Anyway, compounded with that utter blow was the fact that I found out about half an hour before another interview I had with Haymarket. I felt pretty defeated when I went in there but I gave it my best and guess what?

I didn't get that job either!

Haha you thought I got it, didn't you? Well jokes on you because I'm STILL unemployed. In fact, they were so kind, they let me know just three short hours after my interview that they had selected someone else. I thought that was kind of nice, you know? It's like going on a date and having the guy call you right away to say: 'You're fat and have a terrible sense of humour. It will never work out. Good luck with all your future romantic endeavors."

So it's back to square one. It's alright though, I will persevere. I've been through worse in my life. Last time I was unemployed it lasted five months and I nearly drove everyone I love and care about to the brink of insanity, so thank god I don't live on the same continent as them anymore! I got up at 7 am this morning and was back at Starbucks like a champ trying to sell myself to whomever would have me. I've already had two calls for freelance gigs so I might be doing piecemeal work for a while. I gotta do it though cause those bills aren't gonna pay themselves (they should learn to though, lazy ass bills).

OK so the good and hilariously bad news is sort of a package deal, so here goes: we moved into our flat! But don't go thinking it was a walk in the park, because I have learned that in London, nothing is ever easy (I think that should be their city motto). On Friday, Franca's payment came through in the nick of time at 4:45pm, thus allowing us to move in officially on Saturday. Franca talked to the Elfin (Saylan) and he said: 'Come in tomorrow at 11 am with the rest of your money and you can sign the contract and I'll give you your keys.' Apparently, when you decode that message it means: 'The night before we're scheduled to meet, I'm going to go out with all my British elfin brethren, get annihilated (and probably climb trees, chant and eat toadstools) and forget to show up to the office.' We arrive at 11 am after withdrawing literally all the money we had and were beyond excited to move into our new home. We walk in and say we're here to see Saylan and the blond at reception tells us he isn't in yet.

I can feel my blood beginning to boil.

She says his associate, Steve, will help us.

Steve looks like he just left prison and was most definitely someone's bitch. We explain that we have money, need to sign some papers and get our keys. He says he can help us. He goes to look for the keys.

He can't find them.

So he calls Saylan. No answer. Calls again. No answer. Finally after the fifth ring, Saylan answers and mutters, 'uhhhhh...ello?' Steve informs him his 'girls' are here and they want to move into their flat. Where are the keys?

They're on the hook in the back.

No, they aren't.

Shit.

So not only has Saylan failed to show up, he's also failed to prepare a set of keys for us. So now this Steve guy is calling landlords and contractors and care takers and maintenance guys and it's all a big mess. Meanwhile Franca's godfather, who thought this would be an in and out procedure, is waiting outside for about an hour and a half on his Saturday off. Franca and I then have to go to the block where our flat is and buzz all these random people to try and find the key. Everyone who would have the key is away for the weekend. It is now 2:30pm. Steve calls Franca. Saylan is on his way. Oh yay! The hungover dirtbag filled with lies and empty promises is going to come save the day! He eventually shows up and starts trying to call and buzz the same people we were trying to get in contact with. We informed him we've already tried all his brilliant ideas, to no avail. Then Franca's Godfather gets real with him - I mean REAL. Literally starred him down and said: 'What are you going to do about this?' Saylan sheepishly mumbled something about a hotel room for two nights and the godfather replies: 'No, you are going to fix this. Get a locksmith and get the locks changed.' 'But I don't have any money?' 'Use the company credit card.' 'We don't have one.' 'Use your credit card.' 'I don't have one.' Silence. 'I don't really care how you do it, just figure it out.' Silence.

Then I piped up and said you do actually have money: we dropped about 1200 quid in cash at the office two hours ago. So Saylan calls the office, then the locksmith and a 3 o'clock we have a new lock and access to our apartment FINALLY. And guess what? It hadn't been cleaned! Literally the ONLY two things this douchebag had to do were: 1) Get keys 2) Get the place cleaned. So he had to call cleaners in at 4 pm on a Saturday and we had to leave our flat while it was being cleaned. WHAT a toolbox.

He is the most incompetent, full-of-shit asshole I've ever had the displeasure of meeting. So today, I called his boss and gave him hell. I told him Saylan is an embarrassment and that it makes his whole agency look like it's run by a punch of amateur clowns. I told him I will never ever go through his agency again and I will advise anyone I know who is looking for property not to go through Hot Black Desiato (that's actually what it's called). I'm trying to get a TV or a microwave out of this ordeal.

The best part is that when I called the office to speak to his boss today, guess who answered? That's right, Saylan. So he got to his boss before I had a chance to and by the time I told him my version of events, he said 'Well, that's not what Saylan said.' I feel like he's more inclined to believe me though, so we'll see what happens. He's supposed to call me back within the hour.

Despite the nightmare of moving in, the flat is really great. I'm happy not to be living out of a suitcase and residing in a home with a shower. (Just a bath. For the last two weeks. I don't want to talk about it.) The place is comically small and has zero storage so we're going to have to be TRES creative with space-saving measures, shelving, etc. Franca's godfather stocked us up with some sweet stuff from Primark (like H&M with a home section) so we got our bedding and towels and stuff which was nice. And like I promised, Franca and I celebrated Valentine's Day with Thai food (from a vegetarian place and I won't lie, it was gross), wine, sweatpants and movies! It was actually really nice, we walked around Angel, Essex and Islington and bought some kitchen stuff for our home and I love the area. Lots of great markets, antique shops, cute little restaurants and archaic pubs. I'm so excited to soak up this area as much as I can!

The actual area our house is in is really cool too. It's an ex-council house, which means it used to be government housing but developers have purchased and renovated it and now rent it out as legit properties. The place we're in is a collection of four buildings called Bingham Court (What up, Pammy?) We're in Chadston House, there's also Barton House and Winston House and some other house, and we're on the bottom floor. In the middle is a big quad and the place is fully gated - so it's like it's own little community, which is fun. There are so many young people and so many ex-pats, I can tell we're going to make lots of friends. We met a strange girl named Olivia last night who'd definitely seen a crack rock or two in her day. Anyway she was visiting our neighbour Eric who was very nice, in his early 30s and owns a bunch of Mexican restaurants around London. We had some ciggies and a Valentine's drink with them and they seemed cool. I'm looking forward to some good times in the quad at Bingham Court!

So tonight I am going out with a friend of Alistair's to a great little pub called The Angelic that Franca and I both love so that should be fun! On Friday, I'm going to a club called Fabric which is supposed to be a crazy good time so I'm sure I'll have an interesting blog post next weekend.

Alright well I should get back to the job hunt. I love and miss you all and hope you're enjoying your family day. Even you little cheaters that don't have families!

Cheers,

Patsy