Computer says no

OK so things are looking up friends. Over the last two days I think I have spent 12 hours job searching and thank the sweet lord above, my efforts have not been fruitless. Yesterday two recruiters called me about a job (it was the same job; I applied to both recruiters thinking one might have lower standards than the other. Thankfully, they both have low standards!) Anyway, so that's a possibility. My name has also been put forth for another job at MSN (hopefully I don't get interviewed by the same ice queen) and there's another opportunity at Metro's website. So things are looking up. I've also applied to a million jobs at the BBC but I don't they hire you unless you can prove you aren't really a human, rather an angel sent from God above to grace the world with your holy editorial righteousness.

I think I got scratched off the angel list a looong time ago so that probably won't work out.

Other than that, I have been pretty boring over the last two days. Hit up the pub yesterday, read a great new book (hey book clubbers, I got the new Stieg Larsson book, the follow-up to The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and it's incredible. I recommend reading it!)

One of the most frustrating thing I've had to deal with since I got to London has been setting up my bank account -- and yesterday I hit my breaking point at HSBC.

So here is the deal with the UK: they assume that everyone is a terrorist and attempting to take part in some shady financial dealings while they are living here. That being said, you can't even get a basic savings account without getting a background check and full-body frisking!

So last week I walk into NatWest where Martin has been banking for 35 years (and the bank where his dad was a branch manager). Anyway, this piss pot who served us was severally mentally and socially handicapped and told us that without proof of address, she couldn't open an account. She asked if I had a phone or utility bill with my name on it. I informed her that since I moved here three days ago, I hadn't managed to find a home, put the utilities in my name and magically receive the bill yet. I did however have a UK passport and FULL BRITISH CITIZENSHIP, a letter of reference from my bank, £1,000 to deposit and no traceable links to Al Qaeda.

She did not appreciate my sarcasm.

Also, in order to get a flat and provide proof of address, I would need a bank account. The whole operation makes no sense and is clearly intended to drive new citizens bat shit crazy.

So we got up to go and Martin told them he would be leaving NatWest and doing doing his banking with another establishment. She said, and I quote, 'that's fine'. Wow. Customer service at it's finest. The Brits aren't really known for being exceptionally affable people but these bank reps were downright snotty.

Then we walk into HSBC and explain my situation to them and they pretty much say the same thing. I leave feeling relatively downtrodden as it could take a month for me to get my own place and though I was put on Martin's utility bill, they only get sent out quarterly so it would take a couple of months to arrive.

Then I found out about the HSBC Passport account (with no help from HSBC). All it said I needed was a UK passport and a valid license from my home country. So I go with the required documents, sit with this woman, talk to her for about an hour and she says everything looks good she has to run it through the system but it should be fine.

She comes back 10 minutes later and says I've been denied. She doesn't know why (fantastic system you have you there) but it might be because I have no income at the present time.

Yah because I don't have a job. Because I moved here a week ago and in order to get a job, I'll need a bank account. And it also says nowhere in the pamphlet I need to have a job. I asked her if there was anything she could do and she just stared at her computer and said 'no'.

I'm not even joking, it was just like this:



Anyway so I left and called the man that solves everything, John Green. He talked to his bank, Barclays, and said they were willing to help me so I am going in tomorrow to sort it out. Honestly though, if you move here, be prepared for lots of people to be entirely unhelpful. I don't want to bad mouth this country (or city) but it was really quite ridiculous.

Anyway really exciting last minute news - we have a FLAT! Franca just called me to say she found a gorgeous place in Angel! I am going to see it tomorrow but we have put our deposit down and it's all happening. I will update with pics and thoughts tomorrow. Anyway I should get back to the job hunt!

Love and miss you all (still),

Patsy